3 minute read
Let’s see if you recognize this pattern.
First we encourage people to believe in Jesus and put their trust in His Story. We say that Jesus is ultimately all that matters in this life and in this world. Shortly thereafter, however, comes the widely accepted bait and switch. We weren’t lying to you as such. It’s just a bit more complex. Now we’re just unpacking it a little more for you. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Anyway, it’s actually not just Jesus. The Church is the Bride of Christ, you see. That’s when we tell people that to follow Jesus you need to be part of a local community of faith because that’s what Jesus taught. It’s not about individual spirituality, but about being in community with other Jesus followers.
Here’s where the wheels really start to come off.
When some of those poor souls we sent to those churches inevitably get abused and traumatized by the religious people in those churches, we get a little gaslighty. If I’m being charitable, I’ll call it “well-intentioned gaslighting.” This is when we use this tactic of simultaneously telling ’em that it’s not Jesus but the people who follow Him who are the actual the problem all the while–and here’s where the maneuver gets super tricksy–turning right around and insisting that it’s essential they find a way to make it work with the aforementioned abusive religious people in local faith communities because, again, believing in and following Jesus requires that.
You trackin’ with me?
Here’s the thing: It’s not OK for us to conveniently a) say that Jesus and “His Bride” are indelibly linked when it helps the cause but then b) piously separate Jesus from “the Church” when the going gets tough. That slick rhetorical maneuver of shifting the metaphor depending on whether we want distance or proximity? It’s horse shit. We must choose. Does the Church reflect on Jesus or not? I’m gonna need a final answer, Regis. Yes or no? Personally, I’m willing to go either way on this one, but we don’t get to eat our cake and have it, too. I gotta know if I’m setting the table for one or two extra if I’m inviting Jesus over for dinner.
We just need to be consistent.
Personally, I’m increasingly coming down on the side of Jesus and His Bride being a package deal. Not gonna lie, though. That Bride of His is rather… eh hem… unstable. You never quite know who’s coming to dinner with Jesus. Sometimes she’s freakin’ amazing and other times she’s decidedly not. When she’s in a good headspace, she’s got this amazing radiating presence of truth, beauty, and goodness that I totally dig. Best dinner guest ever. Unfortunately, other times she’s a total (gender-neutral) bitch who makes it a horrible experience for everyone. In my opinion, the key is you’ve gotta consistently have clear, healthy, firm boundaries with her no matter what.
Back to the main point, though.
I’m sick and tired of Christians gaslighting other Christians by framing the Church as completely interconnected with The Way of Jesus when things are good and a completely separate issue from Jesus when things are bad. That knee-jerk rhetorical maneuver needs to stop and it needs to do so immediately. It’s inappropriate and unacceptable. If the Church is the Bride of Christ, and we take that metaphor seriously in how we understand the whole Christian faith, then the unavoidable reality is that what the Church does and does not do absolutely reflects on Jesus whether for good or for ill. Instead of deflecting criticism at that point, let’s own our shit and do better.
So, which of these paradigms are we going with?
I see two options. On the one hand, if being a part of a local church community is an essential part of the Christian faith because we’re taking the metaphor seriously that the Church is the Bride of Christ, then whatever happens with Jesus’s Bride reflects back on Jesus. It just does. On the other hand, if the healing and restoration as well as the brokenness and hurt caused by the Church is altogether separate from Jesus, then we cannot treat participation in a local community as an integral part of the Christian faith. If Jesus is in no way culpable for what happens in and with the Church, then Jesus and the Church really are separate. So which is it?
